The big stars weren’t the only ones who made Jack Benny laugh. Listen to his radio show and he starts to break up Frank Nelson or Mel Blanc or Frank Fontaine are about to answer him.
George Burns talked about Jack being the “world’s best audience.” And so did another of his colleagues from the vaudeville days.
Eddie Cantor had a heart attack in 1952, which limited his television career. One thing that would seem to be less stressful for him was a syndicated newspaper column. Certainly Cantor had no end of stories about the greats of vaudeville and the early days of talking pictures. And it would appear Cantor and Jack were fairly close; certainly Cantor appeared with him on radio and TV, as well as charity functions.
Jack is the subject of Cantor’s column of August 30, 1954. The hair joke is pretty much the same as one Charlie Farrell did on the Benny radio show, but the topper is new.
EDDIE CANTOR - - SHOW BUSINESS
Jack Benny Enjoys Laughs
The best audience I've seen is another comedian. I first met Jack Benny in 1919. In those days, he played violin and gave out with some chatter. While his violin was not good, his dialogue was pretty bad. However, the Benny boy impressed me with his appreciation of finer things. He laughed at jokes. In a roomful of comedians, Jack is a welcome relief. He'd rather enjoy laughs than get them. This attitude has paid off. Content to be the butt of jokes, Jack has so firmly established his penny-pinching character, he has only to pause after the word "money" and audiences are hysterical.
Following the wedding of his daughter Joan, Dennis Day commented. "I think Jack's the only father of the bride who wept and validated parking tickets at the same time." The Los Angeles papers gave a lot of space to the event. The "Examiner" announced that the elaborate affair had cost $60,000. The Times quoted it at $541,000. I asked Jack if he'd seen the papers. He said, "I read The Times and saved myself ten thousand dollars!" Recently, I spoke at a dinner in San Diego for the Hadassah Women of America. Jack went with me. I paid for the trip When Jack got up to speak, he opened with. "1 don't know why you invited me tonight. I couldn't feel more unnecessary. It's like being on a desert island with Marilyn Monroe and Joe DiMaggio."
He got another laugh when he introduced me. "I can't get over the youthful appearance of Eddie Cantor," he said "Just look at him! Not a gray hair in his head — tonight!" I wasn't going to get him get away with that I jumped up and said, "Gray or black — at least it's all mine!" Jack squelched. "So what? I've got hair at home I haven't even used yet!"
Toward the end of his life, Cantor wrote a book about the people he’d known. Of course Jack Benny would have to be in it. Eight paragraphs were taken up with the above stories (the Hadassah women’s banquet was still “recent,” even though the book came out ten years later). Cantor continued with some tales his readers probably knew, but loved to read about again.
MANY YEARS AGO at a midnight supper, I asked Jack Benny what made him turn to comedy. I thought he was joking when he said it was Jascha Heifetz, until he explained to me that as a youngster in Waukegan, Ill., he had had visions of becoming a serious violinist until one night he heard Jascha Heifetz play.
"I realized then and there that he only way I could make a living out of the violin," said Jack, “was to play on street corners, but it gets so cold in the winter."
And then there was the time Benny found himself pitted against the master ad libber of them all, Fred Allen. How the audience roared as Fred rocked him with one off-script slant after another. But the roof really caved in when Jack finally retorted, "You wouldn't dare say that if my writers were here."
• • •
MONEY, MONEY, money. That's Benny's avowed aim in life. But only in his radio and television life. I've taken him for plenty, and now Jack is on to my tricks. When I recently invited him over for a dinner which he knew would culminate in a little fund-raising he begged off, pleading another engagement. I was a little hurt, because the Surprise Lake Camp project for boys is a favorite of mine. Maybe, I thought, this Benny is beginning to believe his own script.
We were just reaching for our coffee when a knock came at my door. The maid brought me an envelope. There was a signed check inside and a note. "This is for dessert, Eddie. Fill in the amount. Love, Jack."
• • •
FOR 26 YEARS Jack Benny has worked harder than any person on his show to create a fictitious character, and he has succeeded all too well. But hard work is meat and drink to him. If it were for gain alone there wouldn't be any point to this story. At a recent benefit staged by the Friars in Hollywood, Jack shared the stage with such accomplished artists as Tony Martin, Danny Kaye, George Burns, the Ritz Brothers, Georgie Jessel, and a host of their comparable ilk. Who stole the show? Benny. Why? Some of these performers were funnier than Jack. All of them sang better than he. But no one took his job that night more seriously. Benny worked, rehearsed, wrote, and rewrote. In a sketch with George Burns, he played Gracie Allen. It took him an hour and a half to make up, but when he walked on stage his appearance elicited whistles.
• • •
WHEN I ASKED HIM why he did it he gave me a pungent answer.
"I'm a ham."
And I guess he's right. Here is a ham; he's a fine, lovable ham who enjoys every minute of appearing before people. Even if he has to appear as the stingiest man in the world.
That's why I'm stuck on the guy. There's nothing in the world I wouldn't do for Jack. I told him once I'd give him the shirt off my back.
"And do you know what I'd do for you, Eddie?" he said. "I'd wash it, iron it, and charge you only 35 cents!"
What Jack did for Cantor in real life was no joke. As columnist Hal Humphrey reminded people after Cantor’s death.
At the very top of his radio career, for example, Eddie was kept off the air for an entire year.
The mighty radio networks considered Eddie persona non grata to their sacred air after he made a speech in 1939 at the New York World’s Fair attacking Rep. Hamilton Fish, Father Coughlin and a few other fear-mongers whom Eddie referred to at the time as “our enemies within.” [...]
“Nobody in radio, including the sponsors, would touch me until my good friend Jack Benny used his influence to get me back on the air,” said Eddie, when recounting the incident some years ago.
Benny pointed out to the quaking radio men that it was a waste of talent for both them and their public to let Eddie hang on the vine any longer.
Cantor died in October 1964, the year his book came out. James Bacon of the Associated Press related his story in an obituary:
Cantor, a religious man, did much to help finance the new nation of Israel.
“Once I invited Jack Benny over to my house for dinner,” Cantor recalled, “and sold him $25,000 worth of bonds for Israel.
“And after that Benny went all over town telling people not to eat at my house. ‘Cantor,’ he said, ‘serves the most expensive steaks in town.’”
Jack, according to the AP, was not at Cantor’s very private funeral. Family and Jessel only. October 1964 was not a good month for him. Death claimed Cantor, Gracie Allen, Harpo Marx and, the day after Cantor, Mary Livingstone’s mother. For Jack this time, the laughter would have to wait a bit.














































