The Muse of Labor Day

Long before a Maxwell and age 39, one of Jack Benny’s biggest running gags was Mary Livingstone’s poems. A newspaper article published on December 1, 1935 claimed Mary “has recited 36 poems, ‘Labor Day, Oh, Labor Day’ having made the biggest hit.”

Mary was the only cast member of the show in the Harry Conn-written years (1932-1936) that didn’t do something else like sing, announce or lead the orchestra. For the others, acting was secondary.

Mary’s first poem that waxed in emotional tribute to Labour Day was on September 5, 1932. It evidently got enough laughs that Conn started to add more poems. Eventually, the poem became a running gag with Mary breaking into “Labor Day, O Labor Day” show after show just to get a laugh. It became a catchphrase; you can see the line mentioned in newspaper stories dealing with Labour Day. When Mary appeared on stage with Jack in their tours through the 1930s, columnists and critics almost always seemed to mention her poetry.

The poems were so popular that newspapers reprinted them. Let’s pass along a few. First, the original from Labour Day, 1932. I must give profuse thanks to Kathy Fuller-Seeley who has scanned the early Benny scripts and intends to post them on-line. This is quite different than what followed, both in meter and content; it’s more of a non sequitur than some gag lines.

JACK: That was the last number of the thirty-seventh program on the 5th of September. What an exciting time we had in the Studio!
SADYE: Jack -- oh, Jack!
JACK: What is it, Mary?
SADYE: Jack, I made up a little poem for Labor Day, which I think is swell. I think it would fit this program - do you mind if I read it?
JACK: No, of course not.
SADYE (STARTS TO SNIFFLE): Jack, it's awfully sad.
JACK: Go ahead, Mary - that's all right. Read it.
SADYE (READS POEM):
As thru life we wander - often even as we go
Troubles - worry - care endure us yet
Something listens in our ear as oft it was - and still
Isn't it the truth as what you get?
When the night begins each morn or afternoon we feel,
That times are not just what they used to be.
Labor Day - Oh, Labor Day!....
It just seems to reveal
That a rolling stone is not your friend at all,
Old pal of mine ... Isn't that sad?
JACK: Much sadder than I expected.
MARY: Oh, I have another one -–
JACK: Goodnight, everybody -- I'll see you Wednesday.

The Pittsburgh Press of December 23, 1934 examined another bit of Mary’s poetry. You’ll notice a “Labor Day” reference tossed in.

Mary Livingstone thinks it's all right to give father applause for Christmas and let him pay the bills. Ever since Mary broke out with her "Oh Labor Day, Labor Day," she has been laboring under the delusion that folks wanted more of her poetry. She got by with one on Thanksgiving Day, feeling sorry for the turkey as she pushed it in the oven.
"And now," as the announcers say, here's Mary saying "I'm a couple of days early with my Christmas poem but what do you care as long as you're healthy?"
CHRISTMAS
By Mary Livingstone
Xmas time arrives once more
Just as you and I expect it.
And we're happy as of yore
‘Cause we have not been neglected.
We get stockings from our brother
And more stockings from sis and mother,
Stockings from our friends and bosses—
We wish we had four legs like hosses.
And our boy friends—they get neckties.
Everybody gives them neckties.
Purple, brown, pink, blue and yellow.
What else can you give a fellow?
And our mothers—what do they get?
Checks for twenty, should be fifty
Or a hundred if you're working.
It's your mother, so be gift-y.
Now comes father, poor old daddy.
For him, what has Santa Claus?
He pays all the bills for Xmas
So we all give him applause.
So—come on, folks—get the spirit;
Do things in a great big way.
Now's the time to give the presents,
Not on good old Labor Day.

Evidently NBC or Young & Rubicam was sending out news releases with Mary’s poems because the 1935 Labour Day tribute appeared in a number of newspapers with the following introduction attached (and incorrect when it comes to when the first poem was heard).

Mary Livingstone, distinguished American poetess, has been induced to pen a sequel to her famous poem, "Labor Day," which was first heard on Jack Benny's pre-Labor Day broadcast in 1934. Though Miss Livingstone will not be on the air this Labor Day, since her new series with Jack don't [sic] start until Sept. 29, she has written another set of verses for poetry-lovers, and here they are:
LABOR DAY (2nd Edition)
By Mary Livingstone
Labor Day; oh, Labor Day,
We're glad you're here again.
We love you dearly, Labor Day,
We girls as well as men.
We're awfully glad you come right now,
For if you came in December
You'd be Christmas. But since you don't
It's Labor Day we remember.
Christmas has its Santa Claus,
Valentine's Day its Cupid—
You have nothing, Labor Day—
Now don't you think that's stupid?
But don't feel badly, Labor Day,
For if you're feeling gloomy.
To make you gay, I'll have Jack play
His favorite . . . "Love in Bloom-y."
So let's all give a rousing cheer
Because you come but once a year
It might be nice, if you happened twice—
But you can't—‘cause you fall on Monday.

Let’s give you two more. Again, I wonder if Young & Rubicam was involved because the poems refer to the sponsor’s product. In the second poem, some newspapers didn’t bite and printed “eloquently” instead of “jelloquently.” The first is from 1936 (courtesy of Bill Pennell’s column in the Miami News; Pennell was a voice of Bluto at one time) and the last from 1938.

LABOR DAY
By Mary Livingstone
Labor Day! Oh, Labor Day,
You're back again, I see;
It's just one year since you were here,
But it seems 12 months to me!
Other folks hail July the Fourth,
As well as the first of May.
They can keep December 25th,
But give me Labor Day!
I like you better every year,
And I know it ain't no sin.
To tell you, dear old holiday.
You sure get under my skin.
I'll greet you for Jack Benny, too;
Because, dear Labor Day,
For the past few years he's never said
"Hello" without a "J."
Labor day, you hit the spot,
You hit it every time,
Like strawberry, cherry, raspberry,
Orange, lemon and lime.

LABOR DAY POEM
By Mary Livingstone
Labor Day, oh, Labor Day,
Now, for the seventh time,
I'm going to pass the hours away
Putting you in rhyme.
For all of these past seasons now
(They have been six, delicious)
I've been jelloquently lauding you
Although I thought you vicious.
I know you've got a lot of uumph
A lot of this and that-a
That people like you whether spent
At seashore or regatta.
But Labor Day, please Labor Day, Give me this information.
Why should we like you very much?
You end all our vacations!

Mary’s poems continued periodically until 1943. There were three more within the next five years and that was the end of them. Benny’s writers seem to have decided they could get more and better laughs from Mary by having her read letters from her mother (which may have been easier and faster to write than rhyming verse).

One thing that bothers me is a matter of English. To me, the line should use the interjection “O” as in “O Christmas Tree” or “O Canada,” as it precedes a proper noun, instead of “Oh” as in “Oh, my head hurts listening to Mary’s poems.”